Thursday, September 25, 2008

Take That Non-Winning Curse of Mine!

I won something for the first time EVER!

I entered a drawing at Chick-fil-a to win two tickets and meet and greet passes for the Third Day, Jars of Clay, and Switchfoot concert in Irvine... and I won!

Now the question is... who do I take with me? :-)

I'll have pictures on facebook by the end of the weekend i'm sure!

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

What's So Wrong With Dating Anyway?

Ambiguity drives me batty.

For the past two years i've been watching friends and acquaintances endure these relationships with the opposite sex that are some weird hybrid of friendship and dating. They are to deep to be considered "just friends" but to casual and inconsistent to be considered dating. What's up with this? The guys are so unsure about really wanting to be in a relationship and the girls, while often unsure as well, are just excited to be getting the attention that these relationships go on in a vicious cycle of frustration and hope.

I think one of the main problems might lie in the phrase "It's important for there to be a friendship first". Don't get me wrong, i'm all about friendship. I understand that the motivation for this "pre-dating" dating model is to protect hearts and minimize the need to change your status on facebook. However, to be perfectly honest most of what i've witnessed is frustration, and in the end the very thing we try so hard to avoid... heartache.

Is it so wrong to get to know someone by dating them? Wouldn't that be better than trying to manipulate situations so you get to spend time with some girl or guy you like without them knowing that you like them? Dating seemed to work for our grandparents and most of our parents, why do we think we're any different? I know what you're going to say... "but the times are different now. Dating is different." I'm perfectly aware of that fact. However I still think that maybe, just maybe, evangelicals could redeem dating.

Dating does not need to be a lifetime commitment! Going to dinner does not need to mean that you are commiting to this person for the rest of your life. Heck, you don't even need to be committing to another date with this person! I'm NOT saying that I think we should all just date whoever we feel like, without atleast the intention of a second date because I'm sure that would just leave people broken and bleeding a long the way. I am saying that I think we could all stand to grow up a little when it comes to dating relationships. I'm not promoting being a serial dater (i.e. dating more than one girl/guy in a single weekend... not that anyone has the time or money for that anyway!), I am however promoting the idea of asking that girl out that you've been interested in for 3 years but haven't had the chance to "hang out" with enough so you just keep waiting.

Men. Be brave!!! I understand that rejection sucks and girls are scary. It is true that we might reject you, but we will also respect you for having the courage to ask. Obviously I cannot speak for all women on this, but I can say that the women I have talked to about this would be incredibly impressed with your boldness. We are tired of dropping hints... please don't make us do it anymore! Also, your trash gets taken out more than the women of biola do. Think about it.

One last thing. Men, if you are not ready to begin a relationship... then don't. Not even an ambiguous one. Give the women around you enough respect that you protect them from thinking that they are only good enough to be one of your friends and nothing more, even though you spend more time with them than all of your other friends combined. Do us all a favor and be straightfoward with us.

Women, give the men a chance. Don't force them into anything they're not ready for and than expect them to step up. Understand that asking you out is difficult and give them some grace. Also, stand up for yourself! Don't allow ambiguity. Don't be a crazy person, but be strong enough to know where to draw boundary lines if you see yourself heading for one of those weird hybrid relationships.

No matter what. Be clear! If you want a second date, say so. If you don't, say so! Don't leave the girl/guy wondering about where this might be going. That only leads to stalker situations ;-).

I am by no means the authority on this subject, and I'm sure this is not a perfect solution to the problem. I would love to know what you people out there think about this. Do you think we can redeem dating and lessen the frustration? I do.

P.S. Guys, I know there is a lot of a pressure on you financially and creatively when it comes to dating. However that came about, I'm very sorry for it. The girls you really want to get to know are the type that don't care if your first date is at a fancy restaurant or a park, or if your second date is bigger and better than the first. You can relax. Look for the girls that will just be happy to be hanging out with you! 

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Sweet Community

"The solitary traveler may get to the end of the journey faster, and indeed he may gain riches along the way as he leaves the weak and the slow behind him and is not required to share what he finds. However, he will also know pits out which he must dig himself, unrelentingly cold nights, and lonely battles. He will in the end see no profits from it all, for the gain we make from our toil is found in the toil itself, completed in the context of our whole lives lived out before God and in the company of others to whom we are intrinsically and healthily connected as creatures of God. In community our lives are strong and enduring,, like the rope "of three strands." The fool's individualistic life is, by contrast, weak and destined to be broken." -Iain Provan

We need people. We have been designed for community and our lives are "meaningless" without it. Ecclesiastes clearly presents the contrast of the wise man and the foolish man (as does proverbs). Guess what, the wise man is the one who, while working as he should, does not strive continually after gain that is always just beyond his grasp. He knows the balance that must be found in life between sloth and toil. Our constant striving for more is not only a slap in the face of the God who gave us more than we need, but it is a recipe for certain disaster in the end. It is impossible to strive after gain for your entire life without trampling over the people around you. Families are broken, friendships are destroyed, and the individuals life, in the end, accounts for nothing. So you have great wealth, do you have someone with whom to enjoy what your work has brought you? So you have more than your neighbor, is your family bruised and bleeding along side the road of your life? In the end the same fate befits us all. Our wealth, possessions, and awards will not follow us into eternity. Life on this earth is but a breath and it is a wasted breath if it is not lived out under the joy of God; under the freeing, unstoppable view of his sovereignty. God is in control and no matter how hard we try we cannot change or stop what He has set in motion. What a comforting thought! Having wealth or not is not the important part here. The important part is how your life is lived. Is it lived in relationship or is it lived in constant discontentment and striving? So you may have wealth, is it worth forfeiting your soul?

This idea is hanging heavy over me. At the end of my career at Biola what will be said of me? Will I have fantastic grades, remember every detail about the Bible, know the Greek backwards and forwards (ha!) and be able to lord my knowledge over all of the "common people" (i.e. non-bible majors- please know that I am simply showing how rediculous the level of arrogance that is all to often associated with those in this department is, and that I don't think that!)? Or will I be known as a woman who sought the Lord with all her heart, a woman who loved as Jesus loved, a woman who spent these four years in relationship with the people that God has placed in her life, a woman who lived out the Gospel in relationship with others, even if it means not graduating with honors. Will I be part of a community that keeps each other warm on cold nights, fights each others battles, and helps dig each other out of the pits that life throws us in? By God's grace, yes.

I apologize if this comes off a little on the guilt-laden side, it really isn't meant to! Those who know me well, know that I am very passionate (to a fault sometimes), and usually end up having to apologize for what I say. I hope this isn't one of those cases :-)

Tuesday, September 09, 2008

They Probably Think I'm Crazy

My RC and his wife came over for cookies last night, and while they were walking over I locked us out of my apartment.

True story.

Thursday, September 04, 2008


Our screen door locked us in this morning until Heidi broke it.

I'm about to start running around campus and screaming "MAINTENANCE!!!!"

I love my major so much. I get to learn about the Bible for my school! No math, no science, no English (because I keep putting it off)... it's beautiful.

Tuesday, September 02, 2008

Our Pets Heads Are Falling Off...

After approximately a week in the Apartment it suddenly turned on us. It all started with the shower curtain.

We were all minding our own business when "BAM!" (no... not batman) the shower curtain comes tumbling to the ground, never to return to it's position for very long ever again. Turns out, that when the tile gets moist (as it is prone to do in a shower!) the curtain rod can't handle it and it falls. This wasn't too much of a problem until it fell on me. That hurt. So, now the shower curtain is serving absolutely no purpose at all and is actually hanging over a clothes rack in my bedroom so it can dry out until we can put it back up. Showering is quite a difficult task when one has no shower curtain or shower door. It's also very cold.

After the shower curtain fiasco, mirrors and picture frames began jumping from their positions on the walls and our beloved air conditioner decided it was taking Labor day off as well. It has yet to return. Next was the screen door. Now we have to very carefully close our door so that the spring that normally pulls the screen shut, does not put giant holes into our door. Oh yeah, and the first day we moved in our garage door broke twice.

After all of this stuff started breaking voluntarily, I started dropping and/or breaking everything I touched. A bag I was using to carry movies, a sandwich griller, and some cookbooks broke and the contents scattered across the floor. Fortunately, my RC (resident coordinator) was walking into the apartment complex at the same time and helped me gather up my belongings and bring them to my apartment. Right as he was leaving a bag that I had placed on my desk fell over and scattered caramel chex that my apartment-mate had made all over the floor. I just rolled my eyes. On my way back from playing tennis my bag broke, and I knocked a picture frame off the wall in my RC's apartment when we went to bring him and his wife a movie they wanted to borrow.

I'm so glad it's no longer yesterday. So far, today has been much less clumsy. Oh maintenence please come soon!

After all this all I can really do is just laugh. It keeps the tears from coming. Isn't life funny!