Obsession. It's not just a fragrance.

I know it's been approximately 8 years since I last wrote on this, but you'll forgive me won't you? Please?! Well, I'm going to write something whether you read it or not and hopefully you'll come to trust me again over time (please?).

I've always struggled with becoming fixated on certain things. I love planning, making lists so I can cross off the items on the list once I finish them, and thinking about whatever is on my little over stimulated brain. The problem here lies in the fact that these little thoughts and possibilities become obsessions. So the question is whether or not it's possible to change my "plan ahead" personality (and whether or not that is necessary), or attempt to control the things I focus on. Even though you didn't ask, and probably don't care, I'm going to tell you what I think about this. This is also a pretty new thought process for me, so it's not exactly perfect. Here goes!

Having a fixed focus is not a bad thing and I don't necessarily need to change my personality, just my focus.

The problem lies in what you are fixed on. The apostle Paul had a fixed focus, Christ! His writings frequently digress from what he was actually talking about to Christ. Granted, he's usually talking about Christ... but when he's not, the name repeatedly shows up in his writings anyway (Paul's writings comprise 73% of the times that Christ is mentioned in the NT). Paul was obsessed. His obsession drove his passion and his entire life.

Obsession and fixation is not in itself a bad thing. The danger lies in what becomes the object of our obsessions. Paul had it right. Fixate on Christ and all other passions, loves, and trials will be seen in the light of His will. I've always been amazed at Paul's attitude towards trials and pain, but now it's even more clear to me why he was the way he was. Christ and Christ alone.

Now, i'm not saying that we should sit in our rooms and read nothing but our bibles and never speak to anyone but God. That wouldn't be following the example of Christ. I'm just saying that maybe if we fixate on the right thing, the rest of what we normally obsess over will fade to a normal level of priority in our lives.

I'm going to be trying this over the next semester (and hopefully the rest of my life). I want my thoughts and desires to be of Christ and for Christ. His will for my life will flow out of that. My future and God's will for it no longer needs to be my obsession. My obsession can be Christ and the rest is just part of the perks of this life he has given me.

What do you think? Will fixating on Christ help us to stop fixating on other things (although they might be honorable desires)? Tell me!!

"But whatever was to my profit I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss compared to the surpassing greatness of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things... I want to know Christ and the power of his resurrection and the fellowship of sharing in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, to attain to the resurretion from the dead".
~Phil. 3:7-8a, 10-11

Coming Back

I have returned and I will return again soon.

To My Beloved Caitlin, From Jesus.

"When the rain comes it seems that everyone has gone away,
when the night falls you wonder if you shouldn't find some place
to run and hide, escape the pain, but hiding's such a lonely thing to do.

I can't stop the rain from falling down on you again,
I can't stop the rain, but I will hold you 'til it goes away.

When the rain comes you blame it on the things that you have done,
when the storm fades you know that rain must fall on everyone
rest awhile, it'll be alright, no one loves you like I do.

When the rain comes, I will hold you."

-Third Day, When the Rain Comes.

I love you Caitlin.

The Waters Rise...

It was a normal sunday morning at Sunridge Community Church, the constant sound of electric guitars and drums, and the smell of the highly chlorinated water filling the baptismal filled the sanctuary. All was well until...

Three-quarters of the way through practice and it appeared that one of our sound men had finally cracked under the pressure. He was screaming "shut it all off!', and waving his arms around widely while running across the sanctuary towards the door. After about 3o seconds of his screaming the music went silent and we finally saw the water rushing towards us. The Baptismal was overflowing.

For those of you who know anything about electronics and water you know that they do not mix well and this situation is potentially disastrous. Well, at this point everyone is running around trying to unplug chords and microphones as the bass player is frantically trying to save his gear from the flood. I took this as the perfect time to run through the hallways of the church screaming our janitors name, seeing as he is the only one we know knows how to shut the water off.

Eventually, Jim the janitor was found, the water was shut off, and the madness calmed down. The band and the sound team spent the next 20 minutes after the water was shut off squeeging the water back towards the baptismal and using the vacuumy thingy that sucks just about anything out of a carpet. It removed 40 gallons of water from our stage. The baptismal tried to attack once more before the problem was fixed that morning. And all this before 8:30am.

Another Pick-up Line for the Hall of Fame

I've decided that I am going to make a pick-up line hall of fame. Just to keep track of the pathetic efforts made by some of the male type to be smooth and debonair.

This just about floored me, I couldn't believe someone actually had the guts to say this...

"I would just like to shake your hand... and thank you for being so fine. I appreciate it!"

This is how I was greeted at a restaurant by a stranger who was eating with some of his friends... I couldn't stop laughing.

Angels Will Fill My Spring and Summer.

We finally got season tickets to Angels Baseball!!!!

This spring and summer will be filled with baseball as it should be. I cannot wait until April now! We have 41 games, 5 seats, and busy employees... Which means, My sisters, friends, and I will have loads of fun lots of times!

Valentines Day was wonderful. I had a whole day in Newport Beach with my boyfriend, which was absolutely wonderful, amazing perfume, and dinner with my small group girls. We got roses from one of the leaders 2,3,4, and 5 year old boys. It was adorable:-D

Good times.

The United States and the Winter Olympics.

The United States and the winter olympics is a generally sad situation. Let's face it, WE DON'T DO WINTER SPORTS VERY WELL! We dominate the summer olympics, and we barely squeek through in the winter.

Thank God for snowboarders, it is in that sport which our hope lies (We seem to be ok in speed skating thanks to Chad Hedrick).

Enough of my rant about the Olympics. Now, I will tell you a story about a young man who tried to be smooth. (Key word: tried!)

I enter the first set of doors at the same time as this young man at the mall. Than, he walks over and says, "Let me get the door for you" as he holds the automatic door open that was already opened and was quickly closing on his hand. After the uncomfortable laugh he got from me he quickly realized that he had to recover this pathetic moment... So, he opens the real door for me. I once again laugh uncomfortably and say thank you.
It would seem that the uncomfortable situation was over... oh no! He follows me into the music store (I am starting to get worried), I turn around and look back at him with a very uncertain look. He laughs uncomfortably and says, "You have to stop this, you're making me look like I'm following you!" Once again, I laugh uncomfortably and walk away as fast as possible.

That was my evening.

I've finally joined the real world of blogging.

This is my first blog on a real blog site thingy... how exciting for me:-D

I hope you all enjoy this site, and that I actually post on this one.